Wednesday, February 2, 2011

The Reasons I CAN

Fear. My last post makes me sound like I don't have it, that I'm not scared. But I am. I know a lot of other people who are too, and in some ways it almost seems like the cool thing to do to blog about your fears. However, I want to be accountable for my fears, so that's why I'm going to put them out there.  To help me do something to move past them. And hopefully, to help someone else too, if you are reading this and you are also afraid.

This photography thing - it's a dream. But I have a long way to go before it is fully realized. I want to shoot beautiful weddings and beautiful people, but it takes courage to ask, to build a fan base, to make it big. I want to blog about photographing weddings and portraits, but I haven't done any of them yet, so I have no authority. I want to be able to improve my post-processing skills, but can't run Photoshop on my dinosaur laptop. I want to use my photography to help others, too, but where do I start?

These are all the reasons I CAN'T. Sometimes, I just have to tell myself to shut up. Shut up, self, Shut up.

I have to stop thinking of all the reasons I can't and start figuring out how I CAN.

What I can do, what I did, was I bought a camera. That was a good first step - a big first step. Trying to figure out what to get was hard. Should I wait and save up to buy the very best I can afford? Or is that just an excuse to put off my dream? I ended up with a Nikon D5000. No, it's not professional grade, and yes, someday I would like to be a professional. But the truth is, a camera is only a tool. It takes the picture, it doesn't make the picture - that part is up to me. And I want to get started.

So now I have this blog. And I read a LOT of other blogs. And I'm always trying to learn more and read more. So that's what I'll share with you. When I have more pictures, I'll share them with you. As I improve my photo making skills, we'll share that together, too. I really believe that anyone can be coached to take better pictures, so I want to tell you of my mistakes and successes so that you can take better pictures, too.

My New Year's resolution was to make this happen. That bracelet in the picture, it reads, "Aut viam inveniam aut faciam," which is latin for "I will find a way, or make one." It's my mantra. I repeat it to myself when I need to remember that I CAN.

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